Archives - November 1991

THEY CAME FROM MARS AND LANDED OUTSIDE THE FARNDALE AVENUE CHURCH HALL IN TIME FOR THE TOWNSWOMEN'S GUILD'S COFFEE MORNING
by David McGillivray & Walter Zerlin Jnr

Produced by Mary Frost

THE PLAY

Modern comedy, set in a church hall. A Farndale in space, as the Martians arrive to steal the secret of macrame and make off with Professor Einstein's greatest invention: Roberta the Super-Townswoman Robot. The Professor and friends pursue them back to Mars, negotiate a peace treaty between the planets and generally bring everything to a happy conclusion. All of this is, of course, presented by the Farndale ladies - and token gentleman - who are amongst the worst actors in both worlds. It doesn't much help that one has a terrible stomach upset, another winds up stuck in a Martian helmet and the lady playing Roberta is inadvertently given a large dose of valium early on. With their stage manager filling in as a vicar so wooden he could have been carved and more interest shown in the regional Flower Arranging contest than the actual play, it's business as usual down Farndale Avenue.

FROM THE GROUP

Another Farndale involving those same loveable ladies. This time they are about to be visited by aliens from another planet. Judith Greenfield, who always makes the most of high comedy roles, excelled as Nora playing the part in the townswomen's guild play of the hapless housekeeper being zapped by aliens. Unfortunately she is inadvertently given sleeping pills by mistake for dummy ones and her resultant drunken stupor was portrayed by Judith with a wonderful comic timing.
Again, many unusual props were required and the backstage crew were once more happy to oblige. They also made Planets, Moon and Stars for a musical extravaganza which had to be seen to be believed. Once again rehearsals were a riot - not that we didn't take seriously what we were doing, but anyone who has seen or been involved with a Farndale epic will appreciate just how hard it is to refrain from laughing out loud. Paul Mellor playing the token male amongst the hapless ladies was hilarious. His Gordon the stage manager forced to take the part of the vicar in the ladies play was the very essence of the worst kind of wooden acting. It takes real skill to appear so bad!!!
Mary - Producer

A thank you to Cheree for giving me a black eye. It was the Martian Farndale and I was on stage in a robot's costume (rowntrees fruit gums make good flashing lights) and I'd made the hat out of an empty wine box bag after I'd sobered up enough to wield a pair of scissors. I had accidentally eaten some tranquilizers ( in the role that is) and Cheree was attempting to lift my limp torso up onto a table when I slipped down and her elbow jabbed me in the eye. I didn't notice at the time but when I went off stage and looked in the mirror my eye was totally closed up and puffed out . It went down and turned black and a few days later my mum and I were having a cuppa in a café in downtown Littlehampton when I noticed a rather rough bloke giving me the come-on across the tables. Maybe I looked just his sort of bird.
Judith - Actress

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