He has quickly sized up the rest of the cast and regularly says what he thinks of them, in his own inimitable style and in very colourful language.  Even with my arm up his backside and my hand controlling his mouth he gets away with voicing a lot of things I might think but wouldn't dare to normally say.

This play is probably the busiest one I have been in with plenty of coming and going, so I hope we can both remember when we're on!  I know you will enjoy this one, so get our tickets as soon as they are available.

Photographic Evidence - Mike 13/10/10

As ever, it's nice to get a few pics in, even if they are of the traditional some-people-standing-around variety. Perhaps one day we'll do something a bit more like the Cirque De Soleil, just to get those non-stop, all-action rehearsal shots. Or, being sensible about it, perhaps not...

A monkey. Pictured with Pistachio the ventriloquist's dummy. (That'll be Dave, starring as Bernie Bigelow)	Madam Producer, the lady Mary. Obviously overwhelmed by the quality acting going on somewhere to the right.
Happy people. Zahir as boy-band idol Jake, playing Dick Whittington. Carol, as the harassed assistant stage manager Wendy Westcott-Hall, is quite obviously Tommy the Cat.	Clare-L is the actual stage manager, acerbic Maggie Dunn. She is joined by chorus girl Lyndsey, playing the ambitious Suzanne Brett (although at that moment she may be reading in for Brianne). Martin aka Robin Eldridge aka Alderman Fitzwarren is hiding behind her. And Ann is Zsa-Zsa Gabor - no, sorry, that should be Anastasia Krabbe, starring as the Fairy Bowbells.
This is Carol, ably demonstrating the look that pretty much every cast member is currently wearing. The one that says: "I think I know this next bit"!	Meanwhile, David practices with the lighting board. It's early to be thinking about the technical stuff, which is a bit of a clue that there's quite a lot of it...

Dame On - John 20/10/10

The Fine Art Of The Poster - Mike 13/10/10

#3 in an occasional series of "how stuff happens", and off to a cracking start with a great pun. Okay, so some of us are easily amused.
The poster. Sadly, it doesn't just drop, fully-formed, into our collective laps. That means somebody has to do something to bring it into being, in such a way - preferably - that the Producer makes suitably "wow" noises. More to the point, so do prospective theatre-goers.
It's not so much an exercise in art, more like a marketing product placement, if one is honest. Probably just as well, since my artistic skills are - let's say - workmanlike rather than divinely talented. Anyway, the execution of it is probably less significant than the underlying concept. That needs to be something which both captures the spirit of the production and presents it in a pleasing way to passers-by. The result, hopefully, will not just entice them through the doors, but do so without false pretences. Nice though it would be to produce something out of the grindhouse catalogue, full of babes, bikes and bullets, it wouldn't be a totally honest way to sell tickets...
It's the initial idea which presents the biggest difficulty - finding something significant, representative and illustratable that sums up the play in one single picture. It's somewhat lazy to simply present a tableau of the cast, although that is sometimes the most appropriate choice ("The Odd Couple", for example). It's quite nice if there's some memorable key event or item involved (such as Byron's goblet, in "Haunted"). Normally, though, it's more a case of trying to capture the whole theme (as with the empty wheelchair for "Curtains", or the contrast between neighbours in "Party Piece"). And once that has been achieved, the rest of the poster needs to be fitted around it, following the usual design rules - not too crowded, contains all the pertinent information, uses a viewer-friendly font that demonstrates the right level of seriousness or frivolity...
So, this play - it's all about a low-rent celebrity panto in a fading seaside theatre. Now all we need to do is present that, without giving the impression it's actually a panto and thereby disappointing large numbers of children and their parents when they don't get what they're expecting. The idea, then, is to show a slightly shabby box office selling tickets for an optimistic (but obviously dreadful) performance, as depicted by a traditional style "star billing" poster. Here we go, then: 

The basic "poster within the poster". Several elements layered together, to give Dick and Tommy looking towards London and the sunrise.

Add a frame, some text (Lucida Old English) and pictures of the stars of the show, and that gives the panto poster proper. If this was a genuine panto, that would be enough.

Now to finish the concept by mounting the panto poster on the box office wall. A bit of tidying up, transplant the result into the standard poster template, and the results are there at the top of this page. The font for the final poster title is Cooper Black Italic, if anyone's that interested. Informal and slightly light-hearted, originally advertised as "for far-sighted printers with near-sighted customers". Used in the Garfield strip, although purists may prefer it in the opening titles of "Once Upon A Time In The West".

This would have been so much better if I wasn't practically permanently attached to a third rate has-been.  I really should have changed my puppeteer before consenting to appear.  I mean look how Sooty's career took off again when he switched to Matthew Corbett! Anyway the rest of my supporting cast aren't too bad except for one particular one, but you'll find out about all that when you come and see the play.

Rehearsals are going very well I know all my lines but he doesn't know all his and there isn't long to go! Of course I've got twenty years on him; it is harder to learn when you're older and I'm sure he'll get there in the end! With me starring in it, the play can't fail so you will come, won't you?  I know where you live and a monkey's arms are long (even a puppet one's!)...

Photo-genie-ous* - Mike 07/11/10

It has been said, earlier, that this is not a panto. It still isn't, but yesterday was photocall day and, for maximum multimedial effect, that means bringing out the most colourful costumes we possess and posing artfully for the local paper's photographer.
Happily, given the number of people involved, we were able to use the Village Hall, where there are facilities for changing that don't involve crouching behind bushes or stripping off on Worthing seafront (to name but two fun-filled examples we have known). Some folks, despite that luxury, elected to change at home and come as they were - or possibly even dress like that all the time when they're at home (it would probably be bad manners to ask).
Anyway, it seemed like too good a chance to waste to get a few snaps in while the official pictures were being taken and here are a selection of them.
* No, there isn't a genie, but it's a good pun regardless. Oh yes it is...